Entire "Hackers" Movie Script in IRC format - By Disciple@EFnet

A work in progress.

This is the entire script of the 1995 movie "Hackers" put into "IRC Format". Your nickname is
"Viewer" in these logs, and it is your account of the movie "Hackers" as you journey about IRC.
Please note that this only accurately captures the dialogue of the movie. It most likely will
not accurately depict all of the scenes, all of the intro's and exits, or anything else not
directly related to the spoken dialogue. Please also note that most of the grammar and some
of the spelling was purposely left incorrect to make it feel more authentic.


*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #MurphyResidence 
*** Users on #MurphyResidence: @MrsMurphy @Dade
*** irc.hackers.movie : Date 1988 -- 12:00:00 -05:00
*** Agent (agent@secret.service) has joined channel #MurphyResidence
<MrsMurphy> Oough! Ahhh!
<Agent> upstairs!
<MrsMurphy> what's going on?
<MrsMurphy> what's the matter?
<MrsMurphy> who are you?
<MrsMurphy> hey!
<MrsMurphy> Dade! Dade!
<Agent> knock it down
*** Viewer has left channel #MurphyResidence

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #CourtRoom
*** Users on #CourtRoom: @Judge @Prosecutor MrsMurphy MrMurphy Dade Laywer Gallery
<Prosecutor> The defendant, Dade Murphy, who calls himself "Zero Cool", has repeatedly
             committed criminal acts of a malicious nature.
<Prosecutor> This defendant possesses a superior intelligence, which he uses to a
             destructive and antisocial end.
<Prosecutor> His computer virus crashed one thousand five hundred and seven computer
             systems, including Wall Street trading systems, single handedly causing
             a seven point drop in the New York Stock Market.
<Judge> Dade Murphy, I hereby fine your family forty-five thousand dollars...
<Gallery> *gasp*
<MrMurphy> *sigh*
<Judge> ...and sentence you to probation, under which you are forbidden to own
        or operate a computer or touch tone telephone, until the day of your 18th
        birthday.
<MrMurphy> *sigh*
*** Viewer has left channel #CourtRoom

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #MurphyApartment
*** Users on #MurphyApartment: @MrsMurphy @Dade
*** irc.hackers.movie : Date 1995 -- 12:00:00 -05:00
<MrsMurphy> Dade?
<Dade> yeah, mom?
<MrsMurphy> what are you doing?
<Dade> I'm taking over a TV network
<MrsMurphy> finish up, honey, and get to sleep
<MrsMurphy> and happy birthday
*** Viewer has left channel #MurphyApartment

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #OTVStudios
*** Users on #OTVStudios: @Norm
*** Dade (dade@dade.murphy) has joined channel #OTVStudios
<Norm> security, uh Norm, Norm speaking
<Dade> Norman? this is Mr. Eddie Vedder from accounting
<Dade> I just had a power surge here at home that wiped out a file I was working on
<Dade> listen, I'm in big trouble
<Dade> you know anything about computers?
<Norm> uhm
<Norm> uh gee
<Dade> right, well my BLT drive on my computer just went AWOL, and I've got a big
       project due tomorrow for Mr. Kawasaki
<Dade> and if I don't get it in he's going to ask me to commit Harry Carry
<Norm> uh...
<Norm> ah heh
<Dade> yeah well you know these japanese management techniques
<Dade> could you
<Dade> uh
<Dade> read me the number on the modem?
<Norm> uhm...
<Dade> it's a little boxy thing norm
<Dade> with the switches on it...
<Dade> lets my computer talk to the one there
<Norm> 212-555-4240
*** Viewer has left channel #OTVStudios

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #DadesRoom
*** Users on #DadesRoom: @Dade BOT-DadesTV
*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #OTVSystem
*** Dade (dade@dade.murphy) has joined channel #OTVSystem
<BOT-DadesTV> ...so-called American Indians, Latinos and Blacks come from a genetically
              mediocre stock...
<Dade> yak yak yak
<Dade:#DadesRoom> get a job!
<BOT-DadesTV:#DadesRoom> You are about to experience the awe and mystery, which reaches 
                         from the inner mind, to... The Outer Limits.
<Dade:#DadesRoom> yes!
*** Hacker (hacker@some.hacker) has joined channel #OTVSystem
<Dade:#DadesRoom> hey!
<Hacker:#OTVSystem> U HAVE TREAD UPON MY DOMAIN & MUST NOW SUFFER
<Hacker:#OTVSystem> WHO R U?
<Dade:#DadesRoom> zero
<Dade:#DadesRoom> no uh wait.
*** Dade is now known as CrashOverride
<CrashOverride:#OTVSystem> CRASH OVERRIDE.
<CrashOverride:#OTVSystem> WHO WANTS TO KNOW?
*** Hacker is now known as AcidBurn
<AcidBurn:#OTVSystem> ACID BURN
<CrashOverride:#DadesRoom> unbelievable!
<CrashOverride:#DadesRoom> a hacker!
<AcidBurn:#OTVSystem> ACID BURN SEZ LEAVE B 4 U R EXPUNGED
<CrashOverride:#DadesRoom> yeah ok Acid Burn
<CrashOverride:#DadesRoom> thats enough
<AcidBurn:#OTVSystem> I WILL SWAT U LIKE THE FLY U R
<AcidBurn:#OTVSystem> I WILL SNAP YOUR BACK LIKE A TOOTHPICK
<CrashOverride:#OTVSystem> MESS WITH THE BEST DIE LIKE THE REST
<AcidBurn:#OTVSystem> YOU ARE TERMINATED
*** CrashOverride has been kicked off channel #OTVSystem by AcidBurn (CONNECTION TERMINATED)
<CrashOverride> shit on me!
*** Viewer has left channel #OTVSystem
*** Viewer has left channel #DadesRoom

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #MurphyApartment
*** Users on #MurphyApartment: @MrsMurphy
*** Dade (dade@dade.murphy) has joined channel #MurphyApartment
<MrsMurphy> good morning
<MrsMurphy> you unpack your stuff yet?
<Dade> mmmm
<MrsMurphy> up all night again, huh?
<Dade> can this wait until both of my eyes are open please?
* MrsMurphy picks up the phone
<MrsMurphy> can I cut the electricity to his room so he'll sleep normal hours?
<MrsMurphy> he's been playing with his computer all night for a solid week
<MrsMurphy> well yes, he could be playing with himself
<MrsMurphy> mmm hmm
<MrsMurphy> yes, I'll ask
<MrsMurphy> Dade, you like girls, don't you?
<Dade> yeah, I just haven't found one as charming as you yet
<MrsMurphy> you haven't been doing anything stupid, right Dade?
<MrsMurphy> right Dade?!
<Dade> right mom
<Dade> and I'm still a virgin!
*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #MurphyApartmentBathroom
*** Dade (dade@dade.murphy) has joined channel #MurphyApartmentBathroom
<MrsMurphy:#MurphyApartment> you hooked it up to the phone didn't you?
<MrsMurphy:#MurphyApartment> Dade!
<MrsMurphy:#MurphyApartment> turn the shower off!
* Dade turns the shower off
<MrsMurphy:#MurphyApartment> you screw up again, you won't get into college!
<MrsMurphy:#MurphyApartment> I'm sorry we had to move your senior year
<MrsMurphy:#MurphyApartment> I didn't want to sell the house but I had to take this new job
<MrsMurphy:#MurphyApartment> you know that
<MrsMurphy:#MurphyApartment> You're going to love New York
<MrsMurphy:#MurphyApartment> it's the city that never sleeps
* Dade turns the shower back on
*** Viewer has left channel #MurphyApartmentBathroom
*** Viewer has left channel #MurphyApartment

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #HighSchoolHallway
*** Users on #HighSchoolHallway: @PhoneKid @Students Dade
<Dade> excuse me...
<PhoneKid> yo man chill, I'm talking to Venezuela...
<Dade> yeah, I'm sorry... I was just looking for the principal's office...
<PhoneKid> sorry
<PhoneKid> I can't help you, kid
*** Viewer has left channel #HighSchoolHallway

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #HighSchoolOffice
*** Users on #HighSchoolOffice: @Girl @OfficeStaff RandomGirl Students Dade
<Girl> do you have your transfer forms?
<Girl> it's a relatively straight forward question...
<Girl> do you speak english?
<Dade> sorry...
<Dade> you wanted...?
<Girl> I wanted transfer forms
* Dade gives transfer forms to Girl
<Girl> ok :)
<Girl> are you coming?
* RandomGirl waives at Dade
*** Viewer has left channel #HighSchoolOffice

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #HighSchoolHallway
*** Users on #HighSchoolHallway: @Girl Students Dade
<Girl> the gym is through there
<Girl> and the cafeteria is through there
<Dade> great.
<Dade> cool.
<Dade> ...whats your name?
*** Girl is now known as Kate
<Kate> Kate.
<Kate> Kate Libby.
<Kate> here's your class
<Dade> my class...
<Dade> you mean I'm, I'm not in your class?
<Kate> no, you're not in my class *grin*
<Dade> give me time...
*** Guy (guy@random.guy) has joined channel #HighSchoolHallway
<Guy> Dade: you new?
<Dade> Guy: yeah
<Guy> tell him about the pool kate
<Dade> pool?
<Kate> yeah, there's an olympic size swimming pool up on the roof
<Kate> take the stairs, over there
<Dade> yeah!
<Dade> sure!
<Dade> thanks!
* Kate half-way waives
*** Viewer has left channel #HighSchoolHallway

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #HighSchoolRoof
*** Users on #HighSchoolRoof: Nerd Geek Dorks Dade
<Nerd> Hey!
<Nerd> hold the door!
* Geek fumes
<Dade> ...no pool.
* Dade slams locked door
*** Server Notice -- It is begining to rain.
*** Viewer has left channel #HighSchoolRoof

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #HighSchoolHallway
*** Users on #HighSchoolHallway: @Kate @Students Dade
*** Dade is now known as DadeSoaked
* DadeSoaked eyes Kate
<Kate> hoh... heh!
<Kate> oh my god...
<Kate> he found the pool
*** Viewer has left channel #HighSchoolHallway

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #ComputerClass
*** Users on #ComputerClass: @MrSimpson Kid Students Dade
<MrSimpson> I'm MrSimpson
<MrSimpson> I'm subbing for Ms Bayliss who was arrested at the anti-fur rally
* Students laugh and carry on
* Dade pulls up Kate Libby's school profile on his computer
<MrSimpson> I know some of you kids got computers at home
<MrSimpson> but these are school property people
* Dade adds himself to Kate's Adv English class
<MrSimpson> and I don't wanna see any gum stuck to em
* Kid looks over Dade's shoulder...
<MrSimpson> Chapter 1, designing graphical interface...
*** Viewer has left channel #ComputerClass

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #OutsideSchool
*** Users on #OutsideSchool: @Students
*** Dade (dade@dade.murphy) has joined channel #OutsideSchool
*** Kid (kid@phantom.phreak) has joined channel #OutsideSchool
<Kid> Dade: so, uh
<Kid> what's your interest in Kate Libby, eh?
<Kid> academic?
<Kid> purely sexual?
<Dade> homocidal?
<Kid> whats up man?!
<Kid> I'm the phreak!
*** Kid is now known as Phreak
<Phreak> the Phantom Phreak?
<Phreak> the king of nynex?
* Dade gestures at Phreak and turns away
<Phreak> I know you play the game...
*** Joey (joey@ugly.shirt) has joined channel #OutsideSchool
<Joey> PhantomPhreak: phreak phreak phreak phreak phreak phreak!
<Joey> PhantomPhreak: dude dude dude dude dude dude dude dude dude...
<Joey> i gotta...
* Phreak slaps Joey
* Dade turns and pays attention elsewhere
<Phreak> Joey! Joey! Joey!
<Joey> what what what what?!
<Phreak> one more "dude" out of you
<Phreak> and i'm gonna slap the shit out of you, ok?!
* Dade turns back around
<Phreak> now i try to save you from yourself
* Phreak flips Joey's shirt
<Phreak> but you gotta stop letting your mama dress you man!
<Phreak> you hopeless!
<Phreak> Dade: check it
* Phreak starts to hand dade a club flier
<Joey> Phreak: I need a handle, man
<Joey> I mean I don't have an identity until I have a handle...
<Phreak> Joey: you know you're right about that
<Phreak> Dade: check it, friday
* Phreak gives club flier to Dade
* Dade looks at the flier and ponders
<Joey> look, alright, wait wait
<Joey> how about "The Master of Disaster"
<Joey> huh?!
<Phreak> you're hopeless man...
<Phreak> utterly hopeless!
<Joey> "Ultra Laser"?!
<Joey> D... "Doctor Doom"!
*** Phreak has left channel #OutsideSchool
*** Joey has left channel #OutsideSchool
*** Viewer has left channel #OutsideSchool

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #OutsideCyberdelia
*** Users on #OutsideCyberdelia: @Vendor1 @Vendor2 @Vendor3 OddVendor Buyer Crowd 
*** Dade (dade@dade.murphy) has joined channel #OutsideCyberdelia
<Vendor1> bootleg chinese software here!
<Vendor2> for your computer
<Vendor2> come on over!
<Vendor2> come on!
<Buyer> Vendor2: yeah you got any...
<Vendor3> any kind of format!
<Vendor3> any kind of disk!
<Vendor3> any bootleg!
<OddVendor> to each his own, ya know?!
<OddVendor> check this out!
<OddVendor> each and every one of you...
<OddVendor> compilation tape... my own making
<OddVendor> I call this this the greatest zukes album
<OddVendor> featuring artists like...
<OddVendor> well I got some Hendrix on there
<OddVendor> some Joplin...
<OddVendor> Mama Cass
<OddVendor> Belushi...
<OddVendor> all great artists that aphixiated on their own vomit!
<Crowd> ugh
<Crowd> eww!
<Crowd> that's gross!
<OddVendor> you can't get this in stores man!
*** Viewer has left channel #OutsideCyberdelia

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #Cyberdelia
*** Users on #OutsideSchool: @Phreak @Kate @Boyfriend Joey BOT-Operator Clubbers 
<BOT-Operator> Please deposit five dollars for the first minute
* Phreak phone phreaks
<BOT-Operator> Thank you!
*** BOT-Operator has left channel #Cyberdelia
<Phreak> no no no, thank you!
*** Dade (dade@dade.murphy) has joined channel #Cyberdelia
*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #VideoGame
*** Users on #VideoGame: @Kate
*** Dade (dade@dade.murphy) has joined channel #VideoGame
* Kate/#VideoGame shows her disgust at video game
<Dade:#VideoGame> that's a nice score for a girl...
<Kate:#VideoGame> think you can do better?
<Dade:#VideoGame> I'll give it a shot
*** Mode change "+o Dade" on channel #VideoGame by Kate
*** Boyfriend (curtis@too.cool) has joined channel #VideoGame
<Boyfriend:#VideoGame> is this kid bothering you Kate?
<Dade:#VideoGame> sorry... can I get some room here?!
<Boyfriend:#VideoGame> Kate: yeah, why doncha come up here?
* Kate climbs up onto platform with Curtis
<Boyfriend:#VideoGame> he's good!
*** Phreak (phreak@phantom.phreak) has joined channel #VideoGame
*** Joey (joey@ugly.shirt) has joined channel #VideoGame
<Dade:#VideoGame> well, it looks like i'm on top...
* Dade looks at Kate
* Kate rolls her eyes
*** Kate has left channel #VideoGame
*** Kate has left channel #Cyberdelia
*** Boyfriend has left channel #VideoGame
*** Boyfriend has left channel #Cyberdelia
<Phreak:#VideoGame> congratulations
<Phreak:#VideoGame> no one's ever beat her before
<Phreak:#VideoGame> you just made an enemy for life
<Phreak:#VideoGame> Joey: boy meets world, lets go?!
*** Joey has left channel #VideoGame
*** Joey has left channel #Cyberdelia
*** Phreak has left channel #VideoGame
*** Phreak has left channel #Cyberdelia
*** Viewer has left channel #VideoGame
*** Viewer has left channel #Cyberdelia

*** Viewer (viewer@hackers.movie) has joined channel #OutsideCyberdelia
*** Users on #OutsideSchool: @Vendors Crowd Kate Boyfriend
*** Dade (dade@dade.murphy) has joined channel #OutsideCyberdelia
*** Phreak (phreak@phantom.phreak) has joined channel #VideoGame
*** Joey (joey@ugly.shirt) has joined channel #VideoGame
* Kate makes out with Boyfriend
<Dade> who's that?!
<Phreak> Curtis.
*** Boyfriend is now known as Curtis
<Dade> and what's he do?
<Phreak> that's it, you're looking at it
<Phreak> he just looks slick all day...
<Phreak> Joey!
*** Phreak has left channel #OutsideCyberdelia
*** Joey has left channel #OutsideCyberdelia
* Kate looks at dade
*** Curtis has left channel #OutsideCyberdelia
*** Kate has left channel #OutsideCyberdelia
*** Dade has left channel #OutsideCyberdelia
*** Viewer has left channel #OutsideCyberdelia